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Friday, June 18, 2010

Complaints to the Dentist About Flossing

It’s what the people want.  It’s what they’ll get. Dentist in Blue Patient in Red

Doc every time I come here, I got fear that you drillin’ down from ear to ear.
Seriously…I eat pretty good, I drink pretty good, I brush just as much as a dentist would.
You gotta help me please, my breath smells rotten, I got gum disease.
Last night I give a girl flowers, she threw them back and said something about Austin Powers.

Listen man, I tell you every visit…how come you never floss, man what is it?
It’ll help your halitosis too, were you lookin’ for the burger that I found while I was cleanin’ you?
Have you ever heard of gingivitis?  While we’re talkin’ now here’s an air freshener so bite this.
I can barely stand to kick it with you, if I was your girl, I’d take jail toothbrush and stick it to you.

Wow doc, you’re a harsh ass proctor, I think you’re jammed up ‘cause you couldn’t be a real doctor.
Listen I respect you and the ADA, but that damn flossin’ takes all day…no way!
You got the string, the wax, the shit is mad grief, and I can barely reach my teef.
When it comes down to my oral hygiene, I don’t really care ‘bout in between, know what I mean?

Gave you the bag, the brush and a little floss, they should help your teeth from lookin’ like a little moss.
So don’t come at me with the anti-dentite mentality, eye between those teeth, and face your reality.
You wanna get some girls, want ‘em to be fine, you gotta spend more time on the gumline.
Lazy teeth cleaner, yeah, no doubt, schedule your next meeting with the girl on the way out.


  1. Dental Hygienist Response: People always flossing like they floss but they frontin, ya track suitin, co-paying, gingivitis nothing. Oh you say you run that string game three times per week? You say you keep those canines so fresh they squeak? Your dogs are barkin and I’m hunting for the truth in your lies, waterpik’ing on this chicken with a bib on her thighs. Next time get it right, up your game keep it tight, when I put you on the spot when I see you come December, just be honest, say you floss “every time that you remember.”

  2. Dentist please invite us but dont tell us we got gingivitis Ive been drinking gin plus minus the fact I been kicking the tin since I got canned at Midas.. okay I say ahh and open my mouth the widest I can for ya hineus..he says hmmm whats behind this.. its tooth decay at its finest.. we need to drill the root with no delay this time quick or you gonna end up with abscess or even worse get ya shit pulled and left in absence... I never gone to the dentist like a chick that practice abstinence.. I got this insurance for cap and dent but I figured aint nothing happend yet.. now I got the laughing gas tooth cut in half I guess... mouth numb from novacane head hurting like Kurt Cobain then finally its time to go when my friend in his Chevy Nova Came ! ?! !? !?!